No pants in the office leads to sexual harassment claims, you guys.

i·ro·ny (noun)


1. the expression of one’s meaning by using language that normally signifies the opposite, typically for humorous or emphatic effect.
“The irony of this blog post is that I am typing it with no pants.”

Look folks, in all seriousness ***waits patiently while you napalm your brains***, I was reading this case last night, which even by my scorched-employment-lawyer prurient standards strikes me as shocking. Sure, I could restate all of the tawdry facts in this post to transparently boost my SEO. Instead, I’ll just sum it up in with a single paragraph from the opinion:

On May 18, 2012, the sales team played a mix of music containing sexually explicit lyrics. One co-worker “ripped off his pants and strutted around the office in his peach colored briefs. When [Plaintiff] implored him to put his pants back on, [the co-worker] replied ‘put that in your lawsuit.'”

So, she did. And, she also included the semen on the office bathroom sink.

(Ok, a touch gratuitous…)

Look folks, if you want a sure-fire way to end up at trial staring down the barrel of a sexual harassment claim with punitive damages at stake, read this opinion and do exactly what the employer-defendant did, right down to describing the work atmosphere as “good for morale and ‘created a fun sales environment.'”

Then call me. And we’ll chat about large retainers and such.

“Doing What’s Right – Not Just What’s Legal”
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