The 15 craziest excuses employees have for missing work just released its annual list of most unusual excuses for calling in sick. “Lost track of time browsing” didn’t make the list. (Probably because it’s sooooooo commonplace). 

“Siri Assistant, what is the greatest labor-and-employment-law blog of them all?”

“I found three stores in your area that sell Altoids.”

After the jump, the 15 best excuses…

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Here are the top 15:

  1. Employee’s 12-year-old daughter stole his car and he had no other way to work. Employee didn’t want to report it to the police.
  2. Employee said bats got in her hair.
  3. Employee said a refrigerator fell on him.
  4. Employee was in line at a coffee shop when a truck carrying flour backed up and dumped the flour into her convertible.
  5. Employee said a deer bit him during hunting season.
  6. Employee ate too much at a party.
  7. Employee fell out of bed and broke his nose.
  8. Employee got a cold from a puppy.
  9. Employee’s child stuck a mint up his nose and had to go to the ER to remove it.
  10. Employee hurt his back chasing a beaver.
  11. Employee got his toe caught in a vent cover.
  12. Employee had a headache after going to too many garage sales.
  13. Employee’s brother-in-law was kidnapped by a drug cartel while in Mexico.
  14. Employee drank anti-freeze by mistake and had to go to the hospital.
  15. Employee was at a bowling alley and a bucket filled with water crashed through the ceiling and hit her on the head.

When are employees most likely to call in sick?

  • January through March – 34%
  • April through June – 13%
  • July through September – 30%
  • October through December – 23%

Of those surveyed, only 28% reported checking up on an employee who calls in sick, citing the following examples:

  • 69% percent required a doctor’s note
  • 52% percent called the employee
  • 19% had another employee call the employee
  • 16% drove by the employee’s home

Here is an infographic summarizing all of the survey results.

Image credit:

  • Wn2bntx

    Nope the best one ever…I can’t come to work because my aura isn’t right.

    • In one of the threads on LinkedIn discussing this post, an attorney noted that, at her former job, an employee swore under oath at a removal hearing that she was absent from work because she had been abducted by aliens on her way to work.